Previously on…what ever the hell this thing here is…
In response to a bunch of nosy fuckwits (http://www.untilabortionends.com/en-us/submissions/default.aspx) who decided to give up random, stupid, trivial shit so that they can have a say in other women’s uterine activities, I made a vow.
That vow was:
Feral’s Pledge of Moral Moralitude
I pledge that until congress removes all restrictions governing a woman’s rights to sovereignty of her own body, AND until LGBT (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lgbt) people all across the United States of America can marry who they want, I am giving up bananas on my blog.
Now, for those of you who have read my train wreck… erm… blog, you will know that this is a very big thing. Since I have made this vow, I have had several photos I could not share, a couple posts that I could not finish because they were terribly and horribly bananacentric, (Yes. That is a word. Deal with it!) and several other things that I just couldn’t do.
It has been pointed out by several of my friends that my vow did not apply to my vlog (VLOG HERE!), because I didn’t mention it in my vow. While this is technically correct (and we all know, this is the best kind of correct.), I feel that this would be cheating. I mean, yeah, the vlog is newer than the vow is, so the vow didn’t cover it, but it’s another outlet for my shallow, sandbar filled stream of consciousness jibber-jabber. I actually had to scrap an episode of it because it was bananacentric, and I just didn’t feel right about it.
|If not for this damn vow, these would be bananas.|
“But aren’t you breaking that vow right now? I mean, you’re talking about bananas RIGHT NOW!”
I guess, technically, yes, I am breaking that vow, but I am keeping with the spirit of it. The mentions of bananas are to illustrate a point, not for the sheer joy of them. I want you to know how much I am actually giving up. Not only have I given them up on my blog. I haven’t used them in my vlog. I have dropped my signature on a couple forums (which had a banana reference) and stopped using a couple of my jokes.
I didn’t realize how much of my life actually featured bananas. It’s a bit sick, actually.
Mondays are the days I watch my videos and catch up on things I might have missed on the web.
I checked out my videos today, nice and early. I mean, I couldn’t sleep and lack of sleep is eroding my ability to write anything aside from this train wre… blog. Then the Fondue Goddess sent me an email. In the email was a link. And that link excited me a great deal.
NO. It’s not THAT kind of video. Though, that would have excited me, too! Wait.. what? Was that out loud?
|This is a minion without bananas. He is sad. So, so very sad.|
I wanted to share it with you… I wanted to share this awesome video with you. It’s the teaser for a sequel that I am looking forward. “Despicable Me 2”. It’s coming out in 2013. I am so, so, so, so excited. I LOVED the first one and I am pretty sure that the second one is going to rock. I would love to share it with you, but I can’t. It’s a banana video.
I can’t tell you to go to youtube and look up “Despicable Me 2.” I can’t tell you anything really.
Why? Why can’t I tell you and show you? Why do I look as sad as this little guy over here?
Because there are people who are well and truly in love in this country and, in fact, the world, that cannot marry the person who they love… And the reason they can’t is because some people just can’t mind their own business.
They have to have their hands, rules and laws in other people’s lives, in their bodies and relationships as well as their souls. I know, I am not one of those people who is directly effected by these laws and really shouldn’t compare my little bit of misery because I can’t show you the banana video.
And really, it’s not about that at all. I use the banana as a safe way to state that I have feelings about this topic. As an Aspie… I’m not always comfortable having strong feelings. Especially on a topic that I really have no right to discuss. I mean, honestly…it’s not rational… and therefore it’s a bit silly.
CONGRESS! Listen up! Let them get married already… They aren’t going to ruin you. They aren’t going to ruin the family… That was done with your bullshit already (it is estimated that over 65% of marriages break up over money issues and guess what: the economy is your damn fault). Let it go… just because you are miserable doesn’t give you the right to make us all the same way.
Dammit! I want my bananas back!
|This is not a banana|
The images in this issue were SHAMELESSLY stolen from the following sources: